Ralph & Muriel

Me:  "Oh look!  Ralph and Muriel are back!"

David: "How do you know it's Ralph and Muriel?"

Me: "It has to be Ralph and Muriel because they came here, to us, not some other place."

David: "But how do you know it's our Ralph and Muriel and not a pair of other Mallards posing as Ralph and Muriel?"

Me: "I can tell. It's them alright."

David: "It's amazing they stayed together all this time."

Me: "Maybe he tells good jokes?"

Ralph:  "Two ducks were spending the night together in a hotel room. The man-duck wanted to have 'relations' with the lady-duck. But the first thing the lady-duck asked was "Do you have a condom?"

The man-duck frowned and said "No."

So the lady-duck told the man-duck that if he didn't get a condom, they could not have 'relations.'

"Maybe they sell them at the front desk" she suggested.

So the man-duck went down to the lobby and asked the hotel clerk if they had condoms.

"Yes we do" the clerk said and pulled one out from under the counter and gave it to the man-duck.

The clerk asked "Would you like me to put it on your bill?"

Muriel: "Quack, quack, quack, quack, quack!!!"